The Illuminati is actually a secret society that was founded way back in the year 1776 that is bent on world domination. The Illuminati has cast a very wide net and actually infiltrated the worlds banking, entertainment, political, and academic sectors. Their members actually consist of the worlds most powerful and also influential people. Upon joining, the members are sworn to secrecy and rarely acknowledge the organizations existence.
Our crack team of investigators has actually risked their lives and limbs to bring you these shocking revelations in reality. In the following pages, we will actually reveal some the Illuminatis most powerful members. Here there are as follows:
Ellen DeGeneres actually hates gay people, more specifically, gay men. While a prominent lesbian herself, she just considers male homosexuality to be an abomination and hence she uses her wealth and entertainment industry influence to undermine the male gay marriage movement. Ellen actively set out to join the Illuminati to actually gain a very powerful ally for her ambitions.
In exchange for her services, mostly in the form of subliminal propaganda campaigns, the Illuminati is actively working to fulfill Ellens ultimate goal which is: a take-over of Australia, followed by a banishment of all male homosexuals therein, turning the country into the worlds first lesbian colony, and establishing her as Queen of the Lesbians in reality.
Jay Z was actually a member of the Illuminatis Department of Urban Sabotage, his duties actually included selling drugs (mostly crack) to the inner city youths in an attempt to undermine urban development. His talents for rapping and business were very quickly noticed by the leadership and they went on to finance his entertainment career properly.
He has now risen to become the head of the Illuminatis entertainment arm, where it is his duty to influence a hell lot of young people in whatever matter he is ordered to by the elusive societys leadership.
7 Adam Levine
How as can you explain the success of such a talentless hack? The Illuminati has actually backed his band, Maroon 5, with their money as well as influence and forced his whiny, crappy music down our collective throats. Much like the Gods they think they are the reality the Illuminati works in mysterious ways. The investigative team actually managed to uncover documents that prove their backing of Adam Levine, but we have not been actually able to find out what evil purpose is behind the operation.
Know this, Adam Levine is an Illuminati agent and he has actually managed to infiltrate pop-culture. We must be watchful of his douchebaggery.
6 June Shannon
The Illuminati actually recruits the world best and brightest minds. So it is no surprise that we found irrefutable evidence that June Shannon, Honey Boo Boos mother, is actually a high ranking member and part of the so-called Council of Strategic Planning that weaves the complicated webs behind the clandestine organizations plans.
Honey Boo Boos mom actually deals in high-level cloak-and-dagger operations that reach the highest levels of the American, Jamaican, and Swedish governments. Her cunning mind and also the lack of scruples make her the perfect agent for this type of grand scheming.
The Illuminati also deals in large-scale honeypot operations. It recruits some of the worlds most beautiful as well sophisticated women to actually seduce the worlds most influential men in order influence or later blackmail their decision making.
Look no further than Snooki, of Jersey Shore fame. we uncovered documents stating that she was recruited to lure and seduce several men like the secretary-general of the United Nations; Ban Ki-moon, as well as Nelson Mandela, Steve Jobs and Tyler Perry. All of these powerful men have actually succumbed to her classy allure and subsequently become pawns for the secret society.
4 Paula Deen
In keeping with their tradition of actually deploying the worlds greatest mind to further realize their ambitions, master chef, Paula Deen, was just brought into the fold in an ingenious plan to poison the poor.
She meticulously promotes and even sells unhealthy food to lower income Americans in an operation meant to thin the heard. Paula Deens food products, sold in the supermarkets across the United States, are secretly laced with crack as well.
3 Iggy Azalea
We are actually not sure who this is. Her name has appeared numerous times in many of the secret documents we managed to acquire. Using an internet tool that is commonly known as Google, we managed to find this photograph of her. She should be considered EXTREMELY dangerous to all.
2 Tom, From MySpace
MySpace was an Illuminati tool that was meant to keep tabs on the entire world. It was the brain-child of a shadowy figure known only as, Tom.
An inside informant, with great risk to his own life, recounted that Tom from MySpace, and June Shannon (the mother of Honey Boo Boo) concocted the brilliant plan to gain access to everyones personal and financial information via a massive social networking site.
Our informant later dropped this actual bombshell: Tom is Honey Boo Boos real father. When Mama June became pregnant, Tom wanted out of the Illuminati because he did not want his child involved in their dangerous, high-stakes game of world domination. This, in turn, led to his rebelling against the organization and sabotaging MySpace from within, leading to the websites sudden downfall.
Tom was never actually heard from again, and to this day, he remains a hero to those who struggle against the Illuminati.